8 May 2010

Choi Time's Thousand Year Red Flower [By Spectre]

This funny little bulb was passed on to me by a friend the other day as she knows how much a like fine tea. I was a little taken aback as I noticed this wasn’t leaves in a teabag or loose tea leaves, but some weird hard red flower. She mentioned that I should pour boiling water into a mug and drop the flower bulb into the water. “It sounds a little like a freshly guillotined head falling into a bucket of water” she mentioned. Though tempted at times, I’ve never actually chopped anyone’s head off and dropped it into a pale of the wet stuff. However, the bulb did make a sizable splash when I dropped it into the mug. I stared at it for a good thirty seconds and nothing happened. I prodded the bulb with a teaspoon asking it if it spoke English. At this moment I took a step back as the bulb opened up freakily staring at me with one big red eye. Whilst the bulb didn’t actually reply, the leafy bits waggled menacingly about in the cup reminding me of some terrible alien being from a Doctor Who episode. I let the beastie drown a while in the hot mug before hastily fishing it out and dumping it into the nearest bin. I let the darkened green liquid cool before taking my first tentative sip. A slight fear crossed my mind that this was how the alien impregnated its victims with its eggs to hatch more red eyed bulbs, but that soon passed. A decent taste of jasmine hit my wary taste buds and I settled down to a nice healthy feeling beverage. My only complaint about this tea is the price. It’s £15 for a jar! Come on, it’s not like they could even be bothered to put it in a teabag.
By Spectre

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